Friday, May 9, 2008

Mother-in-Law

As we approach Mother's Day weekend, my thoughts are of my dear Mother-in-Law. She was truly a grand lady, and probably the biggest influence in my life. We didn't start out on a solid footing, but we ended at the opposite end. Dee was a stay-at-home-mom, and took her job as wife and mother very seriously. When she cooked or baked, the kids were always welcome to help chop veggies (with plastic knives) and each was given a ball of dough with which to practice. If you told her you needed to talk, she would wipe her hands on her apron, and say "let's sit", and she sat until you felt your problem was well on it's way to being solved. She was very sympathetic to everyone except me. Her answer was always, "Lin's a survivor". How I hated that phrase. All my babies were born prematurely, and each time I left the hospital with empty arms as the babies stayed behind. Her comment was "at least they're alive". She had lost 5 babies, but the suicide of her youngest son in the 90's was what devastated her. The last day I spent with her was in her hospital room, and I was holding Bubby. She was so fascinated with his determination to overcome the odds he had been given (he has spina bifida). She would open one eye an look at me and say nothing. I left her room that evening thinking that she was upset with me for some reason. When I asked my SIL about it, she replied that Dee had told her that her work here was done, that Lin had everything under control and would teach that boy to be strong and to be a survivor. Now I realize that Dee knew that I was a survivor because she was a survivor. It wasn't an insult as I thought all those years, but the greatest compliment she could have given me. She gave me the determination to "survive" all that had been thrown at me. She taught me about love, family, being a good wife and mother, about cooking healthy, comfort foods, and most definitely about Christian living. And, she taught me to be a "survivor". Now, I tell Rod that he is "so like his father". He just kisses me on the cheek and replies, "That's because I live with my mother." Is that not the greatest compliment? I love you, Dee and miss you every day of my life. Happy Mother's Day to all. Linda

2 comments:

Mary said...

Beautiful! She was quite a woman and I feel blessed to have known her (and you!)

quiltingcindy said...

How sweet! There will be many women who will read this post and be jealous of your relationship with your mother-in-law, myself included. Linda, you certainly a blessed woman.